I'm not sure if it's because my first child was a girl that perhaps I grew a deluded idea of what children were like, but now, 7 years later, I'm still flabbergasted daily by my son and his need for constant reminders. It's to the point that I'm wondering if there's an underlying medical condition going on in which a memory muncher gobbles up the info the moment he says, "Okay, Mom!" and then munch, crunch, swallow the info is quickly disposed of.
We decided on Monday that Ayden, the 7-yr-old in question, does not need to play Wii before school in the mornings, due to the reaction he has when it's time to shut it off. I worry about gaming addiction and I'm pretty sure he's a prime candidate for it. He gets very emotional about his gaming time and could probably play - literally - all day, foregoing food and drink. I have woken up at 5:30 a.m. to him already up and playing, which is concerning considering that he takes after his dad and I generally have to drag him out of bed.
That being said, and getting back to my original topic, the first words out of his mouth on Tuesday were, "Can I play Wii this morning?" His bright blue eyes hopeful until I answered and popped his dreams, his eyes filling instantly with tears. Today he tried a different tactic: "Did you mean that I couldn't play Wii yesterday morning, but that today it's okay?" Uh, no, what I said was, "You are not allowed to play Wii in the mornings before school. Period." Again with the disappointed reaction. He's been warned that he's now at risk now of losing it for an extended period of time...like until next summer.
So that's one example of his forgetfulness, but what really throws me for a loop is the, "Ayden, go wash your breakfast off your face," and off he runs to accomplish this goal. Minutes later I discover that his face is just as dirty as it was before he ran off. "Ayden, why didn't you wash your face?" A quick look of startled remembrance occurs and off he runs again. Really? You forgot in your run to the bathroom the very reason why you were running there? Look, I might end up looking around a room totally lost and confused about why I'm in the room, but I'm 33 with 3 kids, a husband and tons of responsibility...besides this blog isn't about me.
This morning he dressed himself in camouflage pants and a lime green shirt. "Go change into shorts," I said, "you don't match." He came out wearing khaki pants, but since they matched I held my tongue because I'm very aware of how many times I correct the poor kid and I don't want to give him a complex. Yesterday he had to change his socks THREE times - first tall black ones, then tall white ones and then finally ankle socks (you know, the appropriate kind when you're wearing shorts).
This constant forgetfulness happens with putting shoes on, picking up toys, washing hands, brushing teeth, eating breakfast...just about any instructions I give him are at risk of being forgotten the moment it enters his mind. We've even loaded into the car with NO SHOES on him before and his defense is a quick shoulder shrug and a quiet, "I forgot."
This morning all the kids had a dentist appointments so they were late for school. We unloaded at the school and are walking up the sidewalk and my oldest says to Ayden, "Get your backpack!" Sure enough, his sisters each have their backpacks on but he left his in the car. Granted, I didn't tell him to get it, I figured it was kind of obvious that he would need it.
So is this just a "boy thing"? I've endured the ER visits, the extra-watchful eye to ensure he doesn't jump from the highest point of the swing set and the need for speed, but is this forgetfulness a trademark condition of boyhood or is it something I need to pay closer attention to, that perhaps it does mean that something isn't connecting in that mind of his?
Being a mom is the best job I've ever had, though I live with the certainty that I'm not qualified for this task of raising children to become self-sufficient adults. After all, if I can't properly relay to my child that he has chocolate smeared all over his face that he needs to go wash off, how can I think that one day he'll be able to drive a car, use a grill (oh my word, what a terrifying thought!!!) and raise a family of his own?
Love 'em while they'll still let you and thanks for reading!
